The Sanctification of Saint Kelsey 

The faithful head of Lord Kelvin's Inquisition has transcended to the rank of Saint, the prestigous honour given only to those chosen by Him. The High Priest and Priestess have granted this honour with the knowledge of Lord Kelvin's approval, for she has performed the required 8 1/2 miracles necessary for sainthood, largely the smiting of our two most potent enemies, the Thermal Relativists and the Idiots. The High Priest and High Priestess have celebrated the attaining of sainthood by Sister Kelsey, Head of the Inquisition on the 19 of May 2007 in a rainy field. Congratulations! 

New Entropy Defence Instructor

Due to the demise, and subsequent resurrection of Brother Mildenberger, he has decided that it is time for him to step back, and to spend some more time with his lovely new wife. Their romance started on Valentine's Day, when he gave her a Valentine and thoughtfully proclaimed his love for her. Replacing him in his former position is Crystal, who is now the head of Entropic Defences. She is just taking over the position in the University of Kelvin, as Brother Mildenberger would like to remain as a High Priest, even with his wonderful new wife. Congratulations Crystal!

Attacks on the Faithful

Recently, in one of the False Prophet's Sermons, she stated that "There is an exception to every rule." This is a deliberate attack against the faithful of the Church of Kelvin, since we all know that Lord Kelvin's Laws a perfect and have no exceptions. As stated in the First Law, "A Pure Crystal's Entropy Is Zero At Zero Kelvins." As well all know well, Lord Kelvin is the only true pure crystal. We all have Entropy, and only He can save us from the Great Heat Death. Priestess Kayla, who leads the Faculty of Thermic Laws, declares this a great heresy. "Because of what the False Prophet has declared, she is saying that Lord Kelvin has Entropy at anything above Absolute Zero, which we know isn't true, because the Lord Kelvin is free from Entropy!"

University of Kelvin is Recruiting!
Recently, due to the unfortunate demise of one of our most faithful members, Brother RJ, by the hand of the False Prophet, an opening has come up. The position at the head of the "Faculty of Defense Against Entropy" is now open, and we are taking applications. Fear not for Brother RJ, for while his demise came about at the hand of the False Prophet with great agony, he is now with Lord Kelvin. Lord Kelvin has parted Entropy and allowed Brother RJ to pass to Him, to be free from Entropy for all eternity. Weep not my children! Please apply in person to the High Physicist, so that he may asses your worthiness to serve Lord Kelvin in this lofty position.